(continued)
And it only happened then because I had an experience that made me realize I was an example. It felt like God hit me in the head. Hard. And then, about a month later I went to Disciple Now. I didn't make any of those week-long commitments that I am just going to break anyway. I furthered commitments I already promised to God. Now I feel like He is leading me to the mission field. It is really sad now for me to think that it took me 18 months to realize all I had to do was give all my "stuff" to God, and He will give me all that and so much more back.